Tough decisions

I never thought my life would turn out like this. I thought, at my age, I'd be married, settled down, raising my two adorable little children (both girls, of course - I wouldn't know what to do with boys...LoL). I thought I'd know what I want out of life and I'd have a pretty good idea where I'd be spending the rest of my life.

Instead I'm single (no children...just wanted to clarify...I mean, one doesn't necessarily mandate the other, right?); I'm anything but settled down - I mean I'm not even sure where I'll be in a few month - not just what city/town, I don't even know what freakin' country I'll be in. Sometimes that's exciting. There's so many opportunities out there, so many things that I COULD do with my life. And then sometimes, it's scary. What if I never figure it out; what if I spend the rest of my life running around, trying to find a meaning/purpose of my life? It also means that every few months or at least every years, I have to face tough decisions. Do I stay in my current job or do I move on? Do I try to find a job in the same area or do I move somewhere else? How am I going to deal with the usual immigration/visa drama?

Sometimes I wish I could just forward through a few months.... Or if I could just travel to the future, make sure that everything will work out in the end - then I'll come back and would happily deal with the day-to-day drama of real life.

Ugh...

I've meant to put up my Christmas tree since Thanksgiving but something always got in the way. Well, let's be honest - I wasn't really in a hurry to put it up. Here's an important lesson about Austrian culture: We don't put up our Christmas tree until right before Christmas Eve. We also celebrate Christmas Eve (yes, you get all your presents Christmas Eve). Oh and we (or at least my family and most of my friends) get a REAL tree and put REAL candles on there. None of this fake crap....

But having lived in a residence hall for years and celebrated quite a few Christmases in these lovely buildings, I have given in and bought one of those fake, plastic trees and fake Christmas lights. It'll never truly feel like Christmas without a real tree but you do what you can, right?

Well, tonight, I decided to finally put up my tree - I mean, there's only four days left and I have to work three of those - and EVERYTHING went wrong. The tree itself seems to be falling apart and now there's fake little plastic needles everywhere on the floor. And then I put up the Christmas lights - halfway through I thought, maybe I should have tested them first to make sure they're still working - and guess what, they didn't work. One string of lights is completely dead and only half of the other one lights up. And I can't figure out which tiny little light bulb is broken.

Ugh. I'm giving up. I miss Austrian Christmas!!!

A Generation Gap

I've been talking with some of my colleagues and friends about the challenges we've all been facing at work. One of the things that seems to keep coming up is that we feel like our supervisor don't always understand us or where we're coming.

Is it the generation gap?

We are the beginning of the millennial generation and while I, at least, have heard a lot about working with millennial students, there hasn't been as much about working with millennial professionals in Student Affairs. I remember seeing a session at a conference about just that topic - I'm not sure how many people attended it but I think it'd be a great session for a lot of senior-level professionals.

I mean, sometimes it feels like they are speaking a different language. For example, when it comes to technology. We're used to technology; going paperless isn't scary or exciting to us - it's normal and how it should be.
They also say that millennials want to make a difference; and I feel like that's especially true for those of us who've gone into Student Affairs. We aren't okay sitting back and waiting for things to happen; we want to make them happen. That goes along with millennials being goal-oriented, assertive, confident and high achieving. I can see all that in myself; I like to be involved in strategic planning; I set high goals and work hard to achieve them; I like to take risks (calculated risks of course) and try new things; I want to be heard. I'm going to push because I want to see change happen.

Ha. That just reminded me of Harry Potter and Professor Umbridge. "Progress for progress' sake must be discouraged." Hermione wasn't okay with that and neither am I. It's not about progress for progress' sake; it's about progress with the hope of making a difference, having an impact. And yes, there's no guarantee that it will all work out in the end but it's better to try than to do nothing, isn't it?

Good Quote...

Okay, I have another good quote I wanted to share with all of you....

"Change your thinking. Change your world."

This quote is on a little notebook (shaped like the earth) that one of my RAs got me last year. :)

Happy Holidays?

Hello Friends,

It's been a while. Life has been interesting lately but more about that later (...and for those of you who know me, give me a call...I got lots to tell you). It's that time of the year - the "holiday" season. One of my friends recently joined a group on Facebook called "I say Merry Christmas" - a group for those people who don't use the politically correct term, "Happy Holidays." It's the time of "Holiday Celebrations" at work; there's "Holiday" decoration everywhere; and stores are gearing up for the "Holiday" season.

So "Happy Holidays" is the politically correct term, right? But is that really inclusive? Yes, we're now including the Jewish religion and a few others who have minor holidays around this time and have minor holidays that have been made way more important than they originally were just so that these religions also have something to celebrate during this season. But we're still not including everyone. What about those who don't have any "holidays" to celebrate at this particular time? Atheists, for example.

I'm not sure that being "politically correct" is always the best way to go. We say "happy holidays" but we all know that people mean "Merry Christmas." We put up "holiday" decorations but we all know the red and green and the lights - it's all Christmas stuff. Wouldn't it be better - or at least more honest - to simple say "Merry Christmas" and admit that the majority of the US population (and especially the ones in charge) are Christians?

Back at home, we celebrated Christmas. There was no political correctness. Even some public schools would have a church service before Christmas break - which is called Christmas break and not winter break. The students who weren't Christian didn't have to attend the service. May they have felt left out, even discriminated against? Possibly. But would calling it "holiday-this" and "holiday-that" really change that? Wouldn't some people still be left out? But we feel better because we were "politically correct," right?

Sometimes I think it'd be better if we gave up all this political correctness and just admitted that people aren't treated equally here, that certain religions are more dominant than others, and that it matters who you are, what you look like and where you come from.

What friends are for...

While most Americans probably spent Thanksgiving Break eating turkey and hanging out with family, I spent my Thanksgiving working out (yeah, I actually went running every day over break), eating healthy (another new goal, or, let's be honest, a recently reintroduced goal) and reading The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. As always that book made me think about me three best friends. We're kind of our own sisterhood. We keep in touch. We're honest with each other. We tell each other what we think, even when it isn't exactly what the other person wants to hear. We have traditions. But no, we don't have pants that magically fit all four of us. And I'm kind of glad we don't. The pants helped the girls in the story to learn how to be together when they're apart - and by book four, they got too good at being apart and they forgot to find the time to be together. I don't want to get that good at being apart. I like that our traditions focus on keeping us together; I mean, we can't do our iced tea ritual without all of us there, right? ;) Haha, yes, we have a friendship ritual that involves iced tea.

Why am I thinking about this? Well, my friends are also loyal readers of this blog. They don't comment here, but they'll comment in our e-mails. And recently, one of my friends reminded me of something important...

It was in response to me talking about not just wanting a job but wanting to make a difference in the world. My friend reminded me that, "A job is just something you do; it's not who you are." I tend to forget that sometimes; I think ResLife - or Student Affairs as a professions - makes it easy to forget that.

But that's what friends are for...
To challenge what you say; to get you to reflect on your experiences; to help you grow as a person. A worse friend would have kept her mouth shut.

My friend also reminded me of something I'd said a long time ago - We were sitting in our basement and were talking about our futures and what we hope to accomplish. And I said, "When I look back at my life, I want to be able to say that I was happy more often than I was unhappy."

It's good to have friends that will remind you of what your goals once were and will challenge you to question if your new goals are realistic and are really what you should be striving for....