One of those days

Today was just one of those days....

I woke up and felt exhausted (maybe I shouldn't have gone to sleep at all - I was a lot more awake on those days...haha...j/k).

I went over to our central office in hopes of catching one of our associate directors because I wanted to talk to him about an initiative I've been thinking about - that already got shot down once but I think there may be a way of resurrecting it or at least making it something we can work on next year during the year (one suggestion was to make a committee and the best way to kill any good idea at this institution is to form a committee because you know then nothing will ever happen; so I've been trying to think of a different approach I can suggest) - but he wasn't there anyway. I also wanted to talk to him about the assessment taskforce that I was co-chairing last year because I really don't want to do it anymore this year...for so many reasons. I like assessment (yes, I'm weird) but this taskforce was not what I thought it would be. But you were the co-chair, you may think, why didn't you change it. Ha...co-chair here just means secretary. ;)

Well, he wasn't there anyway - so much for that plan. I went to pick up the paint for my office. I decided to paint my office. The only problem: there are a ton of holes and cracks in the wall. I've asked to have maintenance stop by and plaster the holes and cracks weeks ago but never got a response. Ugh. That's so one of my pet peeves - if you can't do something or it'll take a long time, just tell me but don't ignore my e-mails/voicemails.

I got back to my office and tried to go online. Our University is rolling out a new security software. It prompted me to log in, which I did. Then it asked for me to download the new software - but of course I don't have administrative privileges on my office computer, so I couldn't. I called our Tech Support Office and of course didn't hear back all day. At least I could go on through a temporary access thing; so annoying though!!!

The next few hours were spent looking at the Hall Director Manual. Yeah, surprise, we may actually have a manual this year. Last year, we didn't get one. What did I do when I didn't know what to do, you ask...oh, let me tell you - I just made it up. There were so many things that we didn't really get trained on; and there's only so much you can cover in one-on-one's with your supervisor or so many questions you can ask...so eventually you just start to wing it. Good thing, I've been a Hall Director for a while and at least know how things were done at other schools.

But yeah, working on this manual isn't the most thrilling thing in the world - but then again, it has to get done.

Things just kept going downhill for the rest of the day. I made one more attempt to call about my walls being plastered - the answer was a "we're not sure" and when I asked if they could at least let me know whether or not it'll happen I got a "yes" that sounded more like a "no" (and I didn't hear anything for the rest of the day). How long do they think I'll wait until I start painting? This office needs more than one coat of paint and training starts on Monday, so I won't really have time after that. Ugh!

I spent some time looking up YouTube videos on how to plaster holes and then wandered around the building trying to find some supplies (they were painting in here earlier) but no luck. I guess I'll just have to paint over it all. It'll look like crap - but it can't look worse than it looks right now.

Oh and then to top it all of, I got an e-mail regarding the new faculty member moving into my building. Apparently they shampooed the carpets for her and are putting new furniture in the apartment and getting linens and all that stuff. Did anyone shampoo my carpet before I came here? If they did, you couldn't tell. The apartment was filthy - the office worse. I feel dirty just walking around the office and if I ever take off my shoes, my feet are black within minutes (no joke!). I was told when I moved in that I'd get new furniture in my apartment because it's pretty crappy - a few weeks later, I was told that the new furniture would be coming here in December - it's July now and I still don't have new furniture. I was sent to help a colleague pick out some new furniture a couple weeks ago but haven't heard anything since; so we'll see if that actually happens.

I'm just so tired of all this. I need my students back!!!

Oh and I totally forgot: We got our key envelope labels. So at the end of last year, I had my student workers prep labels for all my keys and the RAs then put the keys straight into those envelopes. I then double-checked the keys and since then they have been sitting in a drawer ready for Opening. Well, a week ago, we were told that we are centrally printing labels and that we need to use these new labels. What the...? Am I seriously supposed to put these new labels on new envelopes and then move all the keys from one envelope to another; or stick the labels over the old ones, which will look crappy but would probably be less work. As if I have nothing better to do?

You know, the main thing I've learned at this school is to never do anything early - because they'll change their mind ten times and then in the end you have to re-do everything again. But then when you wait, you'll have to do it last minute and be stressed - or sometimes nothing happens and than you have to come up with your own system anyway (and will be mad at yourself for waiting so long). So I guess what I truly learned is that no matter what you do, you'll always be screwed.

Can students be back now PLEASE??? I need them to keep me sane!!!

(And yes, you can remind me of that when my students start driving me crazy in the Fall. Haha.)

Sleepless Nights

I don't know what's wrong with me lately but I just can't sleep. I had this awesome routine going. I'd try to go to bed around 10 or 11 pm and would then get up at 6 am (and it wasn't even that hard - and that even though I have never been a morning person). I'd go running for an hour, get back and watch "Boy Meets World" while doing some stretches, crunches, etc., take a shower, watch "Saved by the Bell" while getting ready and eating breakfast and then I'd be at work by 9 am, if not earlier. And every day, I felt awake, energized and ready to go. Even on weekends when I didn't set an alarm, I would wake up early (maybe not 6 but around 7 or 8) and would have the whole day to do fun stuff. It was amazing!!!

But since Friday my schedule has been completely messed up and I don't know what happened. When I got off work on Friday, I felt a little tired but didn't want to take a nap because then I wouldn't be able to fall asleep at night. I powered through and suddenly found new energy and then I couldn't fall asleep anymore - not at all. Eventually I gave up trying to sleep and went to my office and seriously worked on stuff all night. At 6 am, I decided to go for a 1 1/2 hour run and even then coming back I wasn't too tired. After taking a shower, eating breakfast and reading for a little while, I curled up on the couch, turned on the TV and eventually dosed off. But after just three hours, I woke again and even though I felt a little tired, I wasn't as exhausted as I should have been. I was up all day, got a little tired in the early evening (but again too early to go to bed for good) and when it was time for bed, I once again couldn't fall asleep. So freakin' annoying!!! And this has continued since then.

Monday night I only slept for three hours. Tuesday I was tired and so, when I got off work, I decided to take a brief nap - especially since it was raining and I couldn't really do anything fun anyway; I'm also on duty this week, so my options of "doing something" are somewhat limited as I have to stay within the duty area. Well, the "brief" aspect of the nap didn't work out. I didn't wake up until 10:30 pm, which then of course let to me not being tired at all around midnight when I tried to go to bed. So once again, I gave up on sleeping and have spent the past few hours working on our Hall Director Manual. (Yes, I lead an exciting life, don't I!?!)

Now it's about 3:30 am and I'm still not tired. I think I'll just continue working on this manual for another hour or so and then go running. If I get tired, I may take a nap in the morning - and let's keep our fingers crossed that I wake up in time for work. Naps are dangerous! ;)

The thing is, I'm so much more productive in the middle of the night right now. I've gotten more done in the past few hours than I did all day. And I'm so much more comfortable than instead of being all dressed up, I'm chillin' in the office in sweat pants, a sports bra and a t-shirt. But still, it'd be nice if I could get back to a normal routine one of these days.

Things I miss...

I often get the question: "What do you miss about Austria the most?" My typical answer is, "My friends and family and Austrian chocolate." But there are a few other things I miss - and here are two that I've been thinking about lately:

1) Well-marked hiking trails. On my recent hiking adventures, I've followed trails that suddenly ended; I didn't know where I was heading when several trails were marked with the same color; and without a map, I wasn't sure if I'd find the way back to my car.

But check out the picture. This is what signage in Austria looks like. The signs tell you where every trail leads, how long it will take you to get there. Biking trails are marked differently than hiking trails. Sometimes they have winter-hiking trails noted as well (those that are good for snow-shoeing and those type of things). So who needs a map? Everything you need to know is noted on the signs. And I love the feeling of accomplishment when you climb a peak and you get there faster than the time listed on the sign.

2) I miss swimming WITHOUT a lifeguard on duty and outside a tiny, roped-off area.
Recently, I've been trying to find a place where you can go swimming around here. Driving to the ocean is just a little too far from here. That's something I can do on the weekend but not after work.
I managed to find a state park that had a tiny little pond where you could go swimming - surprisingly even without a lifeguard on duty - but the pond was so tiny that the water was way too warm and it also wasn't very kind and looked kinda dirty. Not exactly the swimming I'm used to from growing up at the Lake of Constance (see picture).

Today, I found a lake where you can go swimming. It's a decent size, the water was somewhat refreshing (I guess nothing other than the ocean is going to be truly refreshing on these hot summer days), but of course there is a lifeguard on duty and swimming is only allowed in this tiny, roped-off area. It was way better than the little pond, but you still feel so limited and fenced in.

*Sigh*

Yes, those are some of the things I miss.

Working in the summer

What does a Hall Director do in the summer? Well, a few of us - the lucky ones - have 10 or 11 month contracts and actually get time off after students leave. But for most of us, this is a 12-month gig. So what is it that we do once students are gone? Well, at first there's all the closing follow-up like paperwork, damage charges, etc. And then summer assignments start. For some of us that means being the hall director for the summer residence halls (after all, there are always some students who take summer classes and want to stay in the residence halls over the summer). A few others work in conference services - which means we rent out our residence halls for different conferences, camps, etc. And the rest of us get "special assignments" such as working on training for the Fall, revising manuals, working on various projects and whatever else our leadership comes up.

There are some things I like about working in the summer: I feel like I'm a "real" person in the summer, someone who a set number of hours. I leave the office at 5 (okay, occasionally, like today, at 7, but that's still a lot better than the usual 10 or 11), I come home and I don't do anything work related. It's like I'm getting this insight of what my life could be like if I had a 9-5 job. And you know what? I like it. I get up between 6 and 6:30 am every day (because I can go to bed early and get enough sleep), I go running, then I come home and do some stretches and finally take a shower. After a leisurely breakfast, I go down to the office, work on a few projects, go to some meetings. At noon, I come back to my apartment for a 1-hour lunch that I usually spend reading or - if I'm super ambitious - working out as well as grabbing something to eat. And then the afternoon is again filled with some projects and meetings and at 5 pm I leave the office, which leaves me with lots of time to do other things. Like Tuesday, when I went swimming for a couple hours. Or just grocery shopping, cooking and then relaxing in front of the TV (that was my Wednesday). And then the weekends!!! I actually get to do things on the weekends instead of either catching up on sleep or going to special events or doing all the things I couldn't get done during the week. Like last weekend, when I went hiking or next weekend when I'm going to visit friends.
Yeah, summer sounds pretty awesome, doesn't it?

Not so fast. There are a few things that I really really dislike about summer. Summer gets lonely. I spend a lot of time in my office, by myself. There are no student workers, no grad assistant, no RAs and students that will stop by. After a few hours of sitting in front of the computer, I just get bored - working on the same project for hours and hours.
And then there's the fact that I often don't agree with what our department does or how our leadership sees things. I try to change them, I come up with new ideas and initiatives - but that involves a lot of set-backs and is beyond frustrating! That happens all year long, but when it's during the year, I can go back to my building, to my little bubble with my students, and I remember why I do what I do and why it's all worth it. But in the summer, I don't have that. So I'm left with my frustration, left wondering why I even care...and sometimes I just don't know if it is all worth it. Maybe I should just stop caring so much - it's just a job, right? But I can't.
So yeah, because of that, summer isn't always all that great. As cheesy as it may sound, I miss my students!!!

My least favorite questions...

Whenever I hear one of those questions, I cringe and feel the desire to either run away or throw something at the person who asked the question.

1) "Are you a US citizen now?" Usually the question comes with the underlying expectation that the answer will be yes. When I truthfully answer, "No", the typical follow-up question is "But why now? Don't you want to?" As if this was something that I can control. And whether I want to or not, I am now forced to give an explanation of the US immigration system, which will of course be interrupted by exclamations such as, "Really?" or "I don't believe it. There has to be some other way." Because let me tell you, the one thing Americans and Austrians have in common is that none of them understands the US immigration system.

2) "Do you have a boyfriend?" Whenever I get that question, the Gay Rights Activist in me wants to scream and say, "Why does it have to be a boyfriend?" but I know that most of the time that would end in a fruitless discussion. And besides, if my immediate family (my parents, my sister or my grandparents) ask me that questions, that's one thing - they know me and have a right to ask that question. But the random relative I see once every three years and who knows nothing about me other than that I live in the US - seriously none of their business!!!

And then the last annoying question: 3) So what does a Hall Director do? I guess we, who work in Student Affairs, all know this question. And the frustrating part - there isn't a brief answer. So do you waste the time trying to explain it to someone, who in the end probably still won't get it or do you just ignore the question and give a very brief, vague answer?

And I'm back - back in the US and at work that is

It always takes me a while to get used to being back in the US and at work again. I got in Monday at 11 pm and then got right back to work on Tuesday morning. I still feel a little out of the loop, am still working on catching up with e-mails (I had 300 unread ones in my inbox when I checked it Tuesday morning) and English still sounds a little weird to me, but I'm back to thinking in English and have pretty much slipped back into my daily routine again.

I'm going to try to not let work suck me in completely and I want to live a little "healthier" this year. That means, not stressing that much over things I can't change (we'll see how successful I am at that) and trying to go running regularly or maybe attend some dance or exercise class. I also bought a bunch of healthy food Tuesday and felt very virtuous. ;)

I had a random idea the other day - related to this blog. It's so difficult to explain what a Hall Director does - even to friends who have been there from my first week as an RA to now or sometimes even student leaders interested in this field or your very own RAs - so every once in a while I'm going to write "A Day in the Life of..." post and just tell you what I did that day. Sound good? Well, we'll see how it turns out.

Back home [continued]

Right afterwards, I got on a train to Graz. From Graz, I took the bus to Gratkorn, where my grandma (my dad's mom) lives. I spent two days with her, then it was time to get back on the bus, then back on a train and head to Liezen, where my grandpa lives. I saw more relatives in two days than I usually visit in a year and as soon as we were done with that, it was time to leave to get back home, do laundry (or to be honest, let my mom do my laundry...thank you, mom!!!) and then head to my friend's house for a week of hanging out with my three best friends from high school. We try to have these "reunions" as we call them every five year. Last year, we had to postpone it because it was just too busy of a summer with weddings and job searches and other plans. But this summer, we made it happen. At times, I didn't believe it would actually happen but somehow the plans - as vague as they were for the longest time - did work out and the four of us were in the same place for five days. We spent the week wandering around, swimming, a tiny bit of sightseeing (a castle nearby) and just hanging out and reconnecting. We stayed at my friend's apartment, just about ten minutes away from my parents' house, which - to be honest - felt a little .... weird. I guess I'm also just not the person for day-trips; I like to TRAVEL, really TRAVEL! My family used to go to a foreign country for three to six weeks and just travel around and explore. We rarely stayed in one place for more than two or three days. It's not that I don't like visiting my family and friends, but it just doesn't feel like a true vacation. When I was little, we used to go "on vacation" for a few weeks in another country (usually in our RV) and then we went to visit our grandparents - which was still fun and a lot more relaxing but not the vacation-part. Anyway, I digress....

After the week at my friend's place, I "moved" back to my parents. My parents are both teachers and unfortunately the school year doesn't end until the end of the first week in July here, so they are still working. However, they tried to take as much time off as posssible, so that we could go hiking and swimming in the lake - even if it was just for half the day and they had to work the other half. On Wednesday, we left again to visit my grandpa. Thursday was a holiday and they didn't have school, so we could spend the long weekend at my grandpa's and briefly see my uncle and my cousins. We got back Sunday evening and I spent one more week at home - going hiking and swimming whenever possible. I spend so much time in my job sitting inside or just running around on a college campus that it's nice to get out and really walk/run/swim. I made the most of that for the past few weeks. Last night, my sister had a dance performance and now my week at home is unfortunately coming to an end again and I'll be heading back to the US tomorrow. I can't believe my summer's already practially over.

I managed to pretty much stop thinking about work though for the past few weeks, which was awesome. I rarely checked my e-mail (which also wasn't that easy since I wasn't home that much and my grandparents don't have internet...or even a computer) and when I did check it, I only responded to the most important things. Even a workaholic like me could get used to a life without work. ;)